It is with many mixed emotions that I said "good bye" to 2009 and welcomed in 2010. Charles Dickens started out the book, A Tale of Two Cities, with a paragraph describing the state of things, ending with "It was the best of times. It was the worst of times." That is exactly how I feel about the year that just ended.
There were days when I felt like I was deeply in the worst of times. There was pain, sickness and tears that I could never could have anticipated. There were nights when I thought I would never leave the hospital. There were moments when I said good bye to my family members, sure that our time together on Earth was over. The emotions are so deep that I cannot really say how I feel inside about those times.
But most of the year was filled with the best of times, times that could not have been experienced without the challenges. There were so many miracles and blessings that my life has literally been transformed. Though it is not a visible transformation, I can feel everyday that I am a new person. I have been blessed by people around me, by people far from me, by people I have never met. These people, the angels in my life, have blessed my family and helped us have miracles.
My young children have learned, grown and we have been strengthened as a family. Tolan and I are closer than ever before. We know we can make it through anything. Is all of this worth the trials of a brain tumor? Is it worth the pain? In my mind, it is not only worth it, the challenges are the blessings that brought about the miracles.
So, I guess you could say it was a good year, a very good year. Here is to much more good in the year to come!