Today was not one of my best days. I had a horrible "recovery" headache when I went to bed last night and I didn't sleep well at all. (I am hoping for a different scenario tonight.) When I got up this morning to get the kids off to school, it was cloudy and overcast outside. Somehow, it felt as though the clouds crept into me, darkening my day, as well.
I have such a hard time getting around these days that when I am able to see to drive, or get someone to take me out, I try to accomplish many things in one trip. Today was no different. My last stop of the morning errands was to grab a bite of food before getting Casen to preschool. Without going into all the details, a group of grown men were across the room, staring me down during my entire time there. I don't know why they were staring, but as I attempted to eat (and with the facial paralysis that can be tricky and embarrassing for me at times) I could feel their stares and laughter coming right at me. Their cruel looks and taunting eyes even followed me to my car as I loaded kids into their carseats. The stares and laughter were so hurtful I wanted to cry.
As I drove home, the cold invaded my body and all I could think about was how I wanted to be normal again, or at least be "me" again (some would say I have never been "normal" :). Usually I laugh these things off, join in the "joke" and don't let them bother me, but today, it hurt.
Luckily, I have caring and loving friends and family who help me remember that those moments are less about me and more about the sad people doing the taunting. Thanks Scott, Jason, Dorothea and my hubby Tolan, for getting me through that short, cold storm.
The good thing about storms is that they clear the air and make way for the sun to shine again. So, that is my hope for tomorrow, a brighter, sunnier day. Happily, my little Daven is running around the house playing games with his daddy, and those sounds are sure to chase away any clouds that might be lingering in the air. My sweet family is truly a blessing in my crazy life!